I talked with Jack via ICQ the other day and we had an interesting discussion. I was floored by some of what he said and it's been playing through my mind since we talked. I told him that I hesitate to answer his questions or make comments sometimes because I still fear angering him. I didn't even think of it before I typed it but once the words were out they hit me like a ton of bricks. I do still worry about pissing him off and I feel stupid for it. He told me that he has any prospective play partners read this blog. He said that being told he was dangerous made him open his eyes a bit and he read this blog carefully. He said he could see that he does have a side to him that is dangerous and all that. I didn't know how to respond to any of it. He also said he felt badly that I still fear his response and fear pissing him off. It gave me a twinge of guilt which was rather odd as well. I still am not completely sure how I feel about his turn around on the topic of our former relationship. A year ago it was all my fault, I was a rotten submissive, I didnt do enough, I expected too much, etc etc. Now, he says he is "seeing" what he did. It's interesting I suppose.

I have thought of deleting the entire blog from the server. The reasons I put it up were/are good ones, but I'm not sure it's a good idea anymore. I'll have to give that more thought before I decide.